Tuesday, August 6, 2013

The Tale continues.

     I need to express again. The picture on the last blog isn't even all the drugs I was given.  I fill out about 2 forms a year for our medications and that includes eye wear.  I have filled out 3 in just the past few weeks, all of which had more than 10 prescriptions on each!  Sigh. So many times our doctors prescribe drugs hoping that is the answer.  I am not a pill taker so this is hard for me.

     I am going to finish the story on how I found out my cancer was back.  This is how I document most of my history so it is probably boring stuff for the rest of you! I had my ultrasound at the hospital on Friday.  I waited until Monday to call the doctor.  The receptionist and I know each other really well after 5 months of regular visits!  She informs me that, yes, they know I was in the ER.  That the doctor will call if there is anything to report on so don't worry about it.  So I wait....no phone call Monday, no call Tuesday.  Wednesday, I was explaining my frustrations to my aunt on the phone late in the afternoon and realized that I still hadn't heard from the doctor so I called his office again.  Now his secretary is getting a bit frustrated with me I think and says, "Kimara, we are ALL aware of your medical "Problem" and if there was anything to report the doctor would have called.  Here comes the famous line, "remember, no news is good news"  in a sing song voice.  I then lost it and said I need to get into a specialist. Can I do that with out seeing the doctor? She said no so I said I needed an appointment ASAP to get a referral as no news isn't good news to me because I know there is something really wrong.  She fit me in first thing Thursday Morning.

     Thursday, I had my appointment at 8 and she assured me I would be to work on time.  They put me right in a room.  I heard the doctor outside the door talking to someone saying this lady you are going to see has been coming for months now and I can't find anything wrong with her. Why don't you give it a try.  Then added, "good luck with that".  So in walks a young pimply faced doctor I have never seen before.  I need to interject here that up to this point I have been frustrated....now I am ticked off!  So when I saw him I wasn't happy about it and let him know.  I said I just want a referral to a specialist. I think I have figured out what it is and no one is listening to me.  He wanted to go through all my history and start from the beginning to see if he could figure it out.  He was an intern doctor.  I said I am not really interested in going over it all again but he was such a nice guy I ended up caving and starting from the beginning of all my medical history.  I am so glad that I did.  An intern is more keen to listen to you.  He went through all my old tests and found from March blood tests that I was extremely anemic and my white blood count was high.  All of these he said wasn't good and couldn't believe I wasn't informed about.  He then went through my latest tests only to find out that they hadn't sent the ultrasound!  The one the secretary assured me over and over that the doctor had looked at and that no news is good news!  Well, he read it in silence and then looked at me and said I am going to read the results.  They found a mass on my left ovary ( I only have one ovary left. 8 years ago I had endometrial cancer and they took out my uterus and my right ovary.  It was fixed just with surgery and I have been clear until this point.)  It was a solid mass about 4 cm around.  The causes it listed were cyst or possible ovarian cancer!  At this point I am crying and I said, see, I told you guys I was sick!  Now we have wasted all this time and I know it is cancer!  Poor young guy didn't quite know what to do with a crying lady.  He didn't deny any of it as he knew my history and I am sure he realized it was cancer as well.  He patted my leg and let me rant then left the room to go and tell the doctor.  They left me in the room alone for 40 minutes!  Not a sound coming from the hallway.

     At this same time, Sean was on his way out of town to go on Mancation (his quadding trip).  I tried over and over to get a hold of him and couldn't get him to answer his cell.  I was just sick....a tumor...that isn't good news and wasn't what I was expecting but it was also a relief in one way to know they found something and finally I was going to get answers.  The doctor came back and I was upset and let him know.  He let me know he only does his best and spends hours going over his patients files but somehow missed this.  I feel bad for him. He is way over worked.  Every Canadian doctor seems to be flooded.  He is young and just didn't have experience with someone with my history.  I blame myself as well. I should have been more faithful in watching for signs and I should have been going to a specialist.  Either way, the fact was I had a tumor and I needed to get it out as soon as possible.

1 comment:

boysmum2 said...

Ah darling, never ever blame yourself, hingsight is a great thing but a horrid thing too as we then 2nd guess ourselves and think we could have done something differently. Thye have the results, they read them, hell it took that Intern all of 5 mins to realise somethig was wrong. So please don't ever blame yourself because they will always tell you your are normal and live with it and that can be so annoying when you know saomething is wrong but no one will listen. Thinking of you always x x Your angel from down under