Tuesday, May 31, 2011

Controversial questions

I want to stir it up a bit. I haven't had a lot of comments lately. There must not be a lot of farm fans! For those of you who do comment (a few friends and my Aunt and Uncle Tom and Dorothy) thanks. I love hearing from you! I am going to ask a question that has been plaguing me for a while and I want you to weigh in.

Are we getting too casual as a society? I am shocked at what people wear at weddings and funerals. I see everything from jeans and t-shirts all the way to sleazy outfits that some deem as classy? What has happened? I know it was a tradition not long ago when I was little to dress up really nice for lots of occasions. Even travelling on an airplane was dressy. Golf courses were one of the last to go. You could never wear spaghetti straps and tank tops but I see a lot of things in the last couple years you would have never seen. Why is this? I think part of it is we have very little respect for things or people.

You just have to look at customer service to see that! What a rare thing anymore. Yesterday, I was treated like meat by some of the nurses at the ER and some were very kind. I had one exceptional porter that treated me like royalty. Sometimes I think Safeway is the only one left with great customer service and the one in Brooks is way better than the one on the SE hill here in Medicine Hat! People truly don't care. When buying an expensive piece of farm equipment the other day, we let the one guy know we could get it $40 cheaper somewhere else, would he match it. He just got in a huff and walked off and said you better get it there then. What! What about potential clients in the future!

I know I speak my mind way too often and sometimes come across as rude but I am really going to work on this as I think it is a lost art to be kind. I want our youth today to do better than we are doing but we have to set an example as parents.

As most of you know, I belong to the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. I see some of these attitudes even slipping into our churches. I am now talking back with casual dress. Here is the controversy. Please don't be offended. I just want an opinion. I see a look of wearing a dress or a skirt with leggings underneath to church. I myself think this look is too casual and I worry if we don't teach our children and ourselves it could slip further. Now, I see almost long shirts with leggings made to look like a dress. . Am I wrong? Is it our best? Where do we draw the line? Please let me know what you think?

*UPDATE: Thanks for the comments. I don't think that leggings can be compared to nylons at all. They just seem too casual to me. Maybe that is the old lady in me talking. If we were meeting the Savior would you wear it? Also I agree that we all must just wear our best not talking about not being able to afford better. I hope not to judge just discuss.


Modest IS Hottest! Canada. said...

I'm with you. But I think it best if I message you privately due to my business interests. lol.

All good things said...

Hello Kim!

I don't like dresses with leggings either. (At church) Skirts are too short if you have to wear them with leggings. Although, in the winter, skirts (regular length) with leggings are ok-seeing as how thick tights are kinda hard to locate down here.

I figure that what I wear to church, reflects on my respect of the Savior. Why wouldn't I want to wear my best to meet Him, or worship? Hence, I choose not to wear flip flops to church. I don't even wear them shopping at the local wal-mart. Heaven forbid that I become one of the people of wal-mart...

On the other hand, there are circumstances that bother me, especially when people are struggling, emotionally, financially, where clothes are not on top of the priority list. I would rather have them at church with whatever they are wearing, rather than not. So, I do my best, and hope that I don't judge others--at least not out loud. Whatever is their best, is good enough for me.

I think that you are referring to general, run of the mill people who are too casual in their every day wear. See my post on summer clothing options down here. It is frustrating.

In the end, it is a sign of the times we live in. I remember being envious of you and your clothes in HS-you always looked very nice. I miss that in our schools. We pulled out our yearbooks and compared them to the ones our kiddos purchased this year. It was revealing-pun intended.

In the end, what you wear reflects on yourself--whether you think it does or not. What do you want to represent to the world? Let that be your guide.

And that is my two cents worth on the subject.

Anonymous said...

I can't believe how some people dress nowdays. Pants way too big and hanging down and leaving nothing to our imaginations. I had that type of clothes that I see alot of young men wearing.'Also the other day we were walking in the park and I said to Tom Wonder if she thinks her skirt is short enough. It was right up there and if she bent over you would see everything.
I find alot of service people being so rude and not wanting to help you out finding something.
Don't get me started on nurses and even Docotors. Some are very nice but alot are so rude. LIke boy am I so smart and you are just this lowly person. I am surprised that the sales guys didn't price match. Terrible.
It isn't just service people. The young people
have no respect for anyone .
I have a hard time with people not dressing up for church or funerals. We sure did and I just don't feel comfortable going toa funeral or church in jeans. Even Christmas parties for work people come in jeans.
I can't get this to post so I am anonymous. Dot

Anonymous said...

I had that type of clothes that I see alot of young men wearing.'Also the

OOPPPs mean hate not had. lol

Stacey said...

I love wearing leggings. I think that they can be worn casually or dressed up just like a pair of shoes can be worn with a pair of jeans or a dress. The thing with leggings is they are a trend or a current style. They won't last and I've seen really beautiful outfits put together with them. I think they're not different than wearing nylons. Often they're used with the same purpose.
I think it depends on how you wear them. A long shirt with leggings is obviously not a dress and I think people who wear it like that won't say it is a dress. At the same time, people who wear a knee length dress with leggings, it isn't any different than nylons in my opinion.
Styles come and go and right now I'm loving the legging trend. In my ward, tons of people wear them and they look great!

Stacey said...

I don't think your question is that controversial. ;)

Anonymous said...

Hi Kimara,
I agree things have gotten way to casual. I have seen it all at weddings and funerals. Church attire has become casual as well, especially in the summer months. I had this discussion with one of our priests and his opinion was that if teens come dressed in jeans or shorts and t-shirts, as long as they are clean and presentable, he doesn't have a problem. At least they are in church.

Stephanie said...

I think that for 3 - 4 hrs ONCE a week people can dress in their BEST! Not their more stylish, not the newest trend but something you would be proud to greet the prophet or our Savior in. I think we can set aside leggings for all the other six days of the week. I also think hoodies and running shoes are inappropriate but I must say I have had the teenage battle yet... So I am just hoping for the best in years to come! But I was taught to iron, press and dress your best! For church and that I will do.. It shows respect and obedience in my most humble opinion ;)

Barb said...

Don't even get me started! I agree 150%. When leggins first came out they were worn as pants...therefore they are pants and should not be worn to church whether or not under a long skirt or a short one. Also I've noticed the sleeves are getting almost not existent. I also do not wish to offend anyone but I believe in most cases we can afford better than that. Thrift stores are cheap enough and I know you can get decent clothes there cause I have. I think one of the biggest problems is that we as parents (and not even) need to set a better example and teach the children. I believe it all falls back on us. I know that is why in RS for example, a few years back they told us to wear dresses when we visit teach and go to RS nights. It is so we can keep our standards and hopefully without complaining. We live in an ever changing world where morals and standards are decaying. It is a sign of the times but we can rise above it. Dare to be different!!!

Anonymous said...

I'm pretty sure the Saviour will greet everyone lovingly, and happily and without judgement whether they are in leggings or not! One gets there based on so many much more important actions in life than what she chose to wear under her skirt on Sunday. :D

Jocelyn said...


This is a link to a commentary on CNN. I loved it!

It's so true, parents these days (I have done it myself) have thought, "Oh that dress is so cute, I have got to have it for Maads" and it was sleeveless. I used to just wear them like that on her. And then one day I could literally see myself having a conversation with her when she was a teenager and her saying, "Well when I was young you used to let me wear tank top dresses, why can't I do it now?" Then I went out and bought a bunch of cute little shirts at wal-mart for a few bucks that now go under her dresses that ARE immodest. The only time she gets away with it is when I am out and dad dresses her, then I change her asap.

I know some may think of it as odd, but really, we are supposed to live the Gospel ALL THE TIME. So that means she wears clothes that are modified but worth every penny to make it that way.

I agree with you on the leggings. Sure, wear them under a dress/skirt that is knee length. It is SO easy to justify clothing choices. It's easy to say, "Well, you cannot see anything so what does it matter?" It DOES matter! Little choices like that can lead to bigger choices that you would not normally make but do make because of the little choices that "didn't really matter"

As for customer service, people really do not care. It is so sad. So just keep caring because one day, someone will NEED you to care. And it will mean the world to them.

GREAT post!

Sean said...

What is "cute" or "attractive" isn't always appropriate. What we wear on the outside is often revealing of the attitude on the inside. If we are casual in our dress, we are more likely to be casual in our attitude. It all comes down to a show of respect.

Eva Aurora said...

I was reading an article the other day about how much the porn industry has influenced everyday styles. The article specifically pointed out certain styles of shoes and then pointed to the way women now shave their intimate areas.

The problem, I think, stems from an erosion of respect. In general, people feel no sense of respect for anything other than vain, worldly measurements of beauty. Respect for God, for people who can't directly benefit you, and for society's good opinion of you as an upstanding citizen is disappearing. That erosion is reflected in how we dress and how we treat each other. Plus, fashion is often just silly, no matter how much seriousness they try to attach to it.

Kristen said...

I agree with you wholeheartedly. I think that people are just too casual. I have a 12 year old girl in my ward who consistently wears a button down shirt with leggings to church. It really bugs me! I recently decided that even I was too casual and decided to start wearing dressier dresses and no 't-shirt' type shirts to church. We really do need to teach our children the importance of appropriate church attire. Thanks for bringing this topic up. I think it's important to talk about issues so that people know what is appropriate and not!

GoldieGirl said...

I wear leggings, I haven't worn them to church cause I can honestly say they don't go with any of my church outfits. But if I WERE to wear them to church it would be because yes, I did feel I was wearing my best, that I looked nice, and I would not be ashamed for my saviour to see me that way, mostly, because I am pretty confident the saviour would know my heart and efforts are in the right place and be happy I was in church to worship him and heavenly father at all.